Sarabhai vs Sarabhai is the Band-Aid for my adulting bullet hole

An ode to the sharp and hilarious satire

In his book The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts, author and counsellor Gary Chapman lists five love languages common in human relationships. Mine is a sixth: roasting people. I cannot seem to have a conversation without dropping at least five zingers or comebacks. This allegiance to sarcasm is a blend of inherited family traits and a childhood TV diet of 2000s sitcoms. Most notably, Sarabhai vs Sarabhai. Remember the catchphrase, “Oh Monisha, that’s just categorically middle class”?

When I first watched the show, I was too young to understand its satirical nuances, but over the years, with every rewatch, I’ve uncovered a new layer. All the characters, as diverse as rabdi and tiramisu, seamlessly fit together, much like real life. As different as you might be from your family, friends or relatives, at the end of the day, together, you make a delectable thali that’s as wholesome as the Sarabhais, a misfit family of five.

For me, the show still serves as comedic relief from life’s realities. Last week, as burnout crept in and I covered the bullet hole with a giant Band-Aid of Sarabhai episodes, I realised that this show isn’t just about the laughs, it’s life lessons packaged as satire and comedy.

Life lessons from the Sarabhais

Let your inner child soar

Adults tend to experience retrograde amnesia on how to be a child with every lap on the hamster wheel. But not Indravadan Sarabhai, the family patriarch. He doesn’t just keep his inner child alive, he keeps his inner pre-teen, teen, and everyone in the middle alive. From refusing to drink milk like a four-year-old to setting up an elaborate skit about yamraj taking his soul to the afterlife as an anniversary prank, he’s a goofy man, as dedicated to his humour as a corporate mazdoor is to their job.

While I’m no prankster, I do try to nurture my inner child by engaging in activities like dancing or art. Other times, I binge-watch shows or re-read books that I loved in my teens (ah, the Twilight series). Making time for things you enjoyed as a child is a great way to take a break from hectic adulting. You can also bring some playfulness into your boring chores, make a parody about washing dishes or doing laundry, or let your humour shine around your work besties, and watch your inner child come alive.

Be the Alpha you wish to see

As someone who grew up as a wallflower, anxiety has always acted as my getaway driver, spiriting me away from the ability to express my opinions freely. A trait which, sadly, conflicts with my career in media (networking as an introvert doesn’t have to be stressful). So, I emulate Maya Sarabhai. I maintain a crisp lob, keep my chin up, my gaze sharp, and make it a point to feel like the alpha of my own life.

The matriarch of the Sarabhai house is independent, strong, unapologetically authentic and has no filters when it comes to expressing her opinions. That is not to say that she doesn’t have her faults—classism, discrimination and a bristling self-expression—but when it comes to standing her ground, being there for her loved ones and prioritising her joys and work, she’s unbeatable.

Your joy > Others’ joy

Sacrifice is the glorified norm in desi households. And the range of expected sacrifices is expansive, from sharing your favourite motichoor ka laddoo with a sibling to giving up your career to look after the house. Sahil, the oldest Sarabhai son, is like the lettuce trying to find space in a McVeggie burger, wedged between his mother and wife, striving to make everyone happy.

But, like Sahil, I learnt that I, too, can’t make everyone happy. So now I’ve resigned from my post as the peacekeeping home referee. Instead, I offer my opinions when needed, but leave it up to others to accept or reject it, and return to my centre.

Sales are soul (and wallet) saviours

Are you really telling me that in this economy, with a 2% salary hike, and bills looming large on the 1st of every month, you don’t chase sales and discounts? The standout trait of Monisha, the Sarabhai bahu, is her constant bachat and bargain mindset, much to the dismay and irritation of Maya, her elitist mother-in-law.

But this seemingly undesirable trait is actually a great money hack, a survival 101. The luxury splurges will come when they have to, but for now, as I navigate my finances, build savings, and attempt to live a social media-worthy life, I will seize every steal deal and seasonal clearance sale to maximise my minimal spending.

Persist for your passion

Picking yourself back up after repeated failures is a Rosesh Sarabhai trait that we should all embrace. Who can forget Momma ka purse jaise hospital ki pyaari koi nurse? While in retrospect, Rosesh’s obsession with his mother seems borderline Oedipal to me, I still admire his dedication to his passion. Though he was mostly ridiculed and rarely appreciated, Rosesh never gave up on writing poetry or looking for acting parts, even if they were as insignificant as playing a train ka dibba.

So we should all borrow from Rosesh’s spirit by being a little in love with our parents and committed to putting our best foot forward every day, as best we can.

The Sarabhais have helped me maintain a light-hearted outlook on life. You don’t have to shed buckets of tears to make your support known during a family crisis, nor do you have to feel bad about reading Tintin as a 35-year-old. You can be who you want to be when you want to be. And you can always tune in to the show for reassurance, because sometimes hypocrisy and humour are all you need to get through life.

You can stream Sarabhai vs Sarabhai on Disney + Hotstar or on Youtube