20 Indian women on the financial safeguards they wish they had taken after marriage

‘I love you’ can be spoken in both sweet nothings and sound investments 

“Hamare paas bhagwan ka diya hua sab kuch hai. Aapki ladki rani banke rahegi. (God has given us everything. Your daughter will live like a queen).” This entreaty greets the modern bride and her parents before marriage. Until she decides to plan a holiday with cousins or revamp a corner of the home.

Many families still find pride in the notion that women aren’t financially independent, relying on them for the simplest necessities.

This sentiment extends to working women too. A 2022 Tata AIA Life Insurance study found that 59% of working women do not make financial decisions independently, while 89% of married women depend on their spouses for financial planning.

“Normalising financial partnership remains a work in progress. Women’s opinions are often overlooked and they are made to feel grateful to men when they contribute to running their own homes,” says family counsellor Tanya Varma.

We asked 20 women from all over India for financial safeguards they wished they had embraced after marriage. Spoiler alert: None of them said, “Marry a millionaire.”

Start financial planning

Women typically lose financial independence after marriage because they quit their jobs, merge their wealth or do not understand financial planning. Reclaiming agency can feel like trying to find a matching pair of socks in the laundry pile – challenging but essential.

Henna Khan, a 42-year-old banker from Delhi, dislikes relying on her in-laws or husband for money, especially for essentials like a mobile recharge or a haircut. Her practical solution: “Maintain an individual bank account and allocate 10-20% of your salary or household budget each month for personal expenses.”

Mumbai-based Edith D’Souza, 55, a teacher, recalls the 2016 stock market crash as the moment her joint finances with her husband took a nosedive. Her advice: “Consider maintaining separate investment portfolios as a risk mitigation strategy.”

“Engage in open discussions, meticulously plan and be consciously aware of educational investments for children to secure their future,” says Pune-based Tanya Nadkarni, 43, who works as a secretary in a multinational company, and is financing both her daughters’ education after separating from her husband.

Prepare for emergencies

Life can be as unpredictable as a cat video going viral. Whether it’s a sudden economic downturn or an unexpected health complication, having a financial safety net can turn any ‘oh-no’ moment into an ‘I got this’ moment.

Homemaker Nikshubha Garg, 59, from Gurgaon, faced difficulties after her husband’s sudden demise. “Ensure nominations on financial accounts are updated. This seemingly small detail significantly impacted the seamless transfer and management of assets during a time of emotional distress and upheaval.”

Women may also encounter misunderstandings with other stakeholders within the family. “To prevent complications and disputes with family members, as I experienced after my husband’s demise, ensure you maintain clear and updated legal documentation. This includes joint assets, properties and wills,” says Madhurima Singh, a Patna-based homemaker.

Baroda-based Yamini Shah, 56, also a teacher, found herself scrambling for solutions when her husband’s cancer treatment exhausted their savings. The couple had no insurance. “Evaluate and ensure comprehensive insurance coverage for both partners. It’s a vital aspect of financial preparedness that can provide a safety net during unexpected crises.”

On the other hand, Chennai-based freelancer Jenna Diaz, 45, struggled with saas-bahu drama after moving in with her in-laws during Covid due to a financial crunch. She says, “Develop a crisis management plan outlining financial steps to take in the event of unexpected challenges like job loss or economic downturns.”

For couples with children, legal documentation is crucial for determining guardianship and custody arrangements in the event of a divorce. “It ensures that debts and obligations are clearly defined,” says Swati Kamath, 34, a Mumbai-based media professional who continues to navigate the legal system for parental support for her two-year-old son.

Get involved with budgeting

Women may call the shots at home but they are often left out of major budgeting decisions. Time for a financial plot twist, ladies!

Upon retirement, educator Meghna Garg from Jaipur, struggled to make ends meet after her husband used all their savings to build a home. “The importance of collaboratively planning for retirement became evident. One must strategically plan for the golden years to avoid unexpected financial hardships.”

Lucknow-based homemaker Garima Srivastava, 37, suggests getting monthly pocket money from your partner. “It allows for financial autonomy – spend it how you want to, no questions asked.”

Bengaluru-based professor Vijaya Pai, 47, dislikes asking her parents for money for daily necessities, given that her husband often exhausts his salary before the end of the month. “Collaborate on creating a joint budget. This helps efficiently manage household expenses and ensures that both partners have a clear understanding of financial priorities.”

Upon being asked to quit her job in retail after marriage, 29-year-old Lucknow-based Soumya Sinha and her husband’s lifestyle took a hit. “Establish spending limits or guidelines with your spouse to prevent impulsive purchases that may impact financial goals, especially when facing lifestyle adjustments.”

Navigating debt

Debt is often a source of conflict, and many women may not be fully aware of their financial liabilities.

Mumbai-based Aziza Khan, 38, a homemaker, advises, “Approach debt as a team effort, but combine your strengths and finances only when absolutely necessary to tackle it.” Her lack of interest in finance led to her spouse obtaining a loan of ₹25 lakh in her name without her consent, using her jewellery as collateral.

On the other hand, Varuna Jha, a teacher from Kolkata, 35, is still paying off creditors after her husband’s sudden demise. She recommends “having and knowing the plan to pay off loans and credit card balances. Creating a structured approach to debt repayment is essential for maintaining financial stability.”

Noida-based Aditi Mishra, a 39-year-old banking professional, faced home loan challenges post-divorce due to her ex-husband’s loan in her name. Her lesson: “Maintain individual credit histories for financial independence.”

Meanwhile, Mumbai-based Nicole Menezes, 44, a marketing executive, loved the holiday her husband surprised her with till she had to dip into her savings to pay off his credit card bill. “Maintain transparency in spending habits to avoid misunderstandings and reduce debt. It’s crucial to communicate openly about financial decisions to align priorities.”

Get a financial education

Finally, just like you stay updated on the latest Netflix shows, keep your financial knowledge current. Because, let’s be real, being financially savvy is the new black.

“Understand legal aspects related to joint finances, streedhan (women’s wealth) and property ownership to secure your present and future,” says Sanjana Javeri, 58, a homemaker from Surat, who is separated from her husband.

For Chandigarh-based Meetu Srivastava, 45, the simple act of learning how to invest equalled freedom. “My husband overlooked my opinions and it hurt my savings. Independently managing my investments ensures they align with my own financial goals and risk tolerance.”

Ranchi-based Jhanvi Singh’s husband used her salary to guarantee a car loan. After losing her job as a hairstylist during the pandemic, the 44-year-old borrowed from friends and family to repay the amount. “Consult financial professionals for guidance on financial planning, debt and investments to reduce risk. They can provide tailored solutions, especially in challenging situations.”

Mumbai-based homemaker Hema Gure, 52, started taking classes on personal finance on the sly since her husband left her out of financial decisions. “Understand your spouse’s approach to investing your savings and explore the available options for you. Secretly taking personal finance classes helped me make informed decisions and actively participate in financial matters.”

In the end, it’s true that money can’t buy love, but it does come with its own set of perks — like a backstage pass to peace of mind and a VIP ticket to security. So, waltz into the world of budgeting and financial planning, and let the soothing tunes of security and empowerment be the soundtrack to your marital adventure. Because, let’s face it, nothing says ‘I love you’ like a well-balanced budget.